Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
