i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize
