I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
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