is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
