to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
