Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Randomize
