hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
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