one two three fourrrrnication!
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
