I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize
