Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
