I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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