Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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