That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
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