what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
