Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Randomize
