My brain says no but my pants say off.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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