She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
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