you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
I will be naked everywhere
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
