I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Randomize
