I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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