maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
So much Jack, so little girl.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Randomize
