I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize