You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Randomize
