you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
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