Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
