.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
