what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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