New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
