Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
Randomize
