Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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