Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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