dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
