Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
