if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
I understand Curling. That high.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
