he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
