I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Randomize
