Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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