i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Randomize