I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I'm drive I can fine osifer
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
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