Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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