Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
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