Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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