Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Randomize
