Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
That reminds me...we need to get swords
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
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