i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
