what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Randomize
