from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
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