Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Randomize
