Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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