Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
So vagazzling was a success
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
