tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
Randomize